Don't Try This At Home

Girl Scout Cookies! *Updated*

Thank you to everyone who contacted me about cookies! Wild Thing and I are in your debt. However, I've been told I'm not supposed to sell cookies via the Internet. I will still honor the requests I've received and I will bill those people when I receive the cookies (about 2/27-3/1). I do need to close the comments to this post. Thanks for your support. (Remind anyone of a 1980s wine cooler commercial?)

This is absolutely shameless, I know. I am resorting to using my blog for a sales pitch. Please accept my apologies and feel free to move on to another blog without responding--I will completely and utterly understand. However, if you have pity for me and my daughter, read on. Especially if you are in the Tulsa area (if you aren't then you probably don't wanna buy anything from use because then I'll have to send it and god only knows how much that'll cost!). If you are out of town, we are still happy to sell to you, but I'll need to invoice you via PayPal before we send you the cookies. (Thanks to GiBee for that fabulous idea!)

Wild Thing is a first-year Brownie and Girl Scout cookie sales are going on now. The ice storm put us behind on our sales and we currently have sold a whopping TWO boxes! (Thanks, Charlotte!) We're on our way! If you or anyone you know is interested in buying some very tasty Girl Scout cookies, please send them our way. I'll list the cookies below and you can feel free to respond (or not!) with the kind of cookies and how many boxes of each you'd like to purchase. You can e-mail me privately at mdmnelson at gmail dot com if you would rather.

Each box is only $4. Ordering ends on Sunday, Feb. 4. Cookies will be delivered/mailed (if you're out of town) on March 1. You pay for the cookies when you receive them.

Types of cookies:

• Samoas: Tender vanilla cookie, covered with caramel, rolled in toasted coconut, and striped with a rich, chocolaty coating. Count per pkg: 15
• Thin Mints – extra thin, extra minty
    Thin wafers covered with smooth cocoa coating and made with natural peppermint (Approximate count: 38).
• Do-Si-Dos – peanutty excitement
  Naturally good! Crisp and crunchy oatmeal cookies with creamy peanut butter filling and no artificial color or flavor (Approximate count: 22).
• All Abouts – celebrate Girl Scouting
  These beautifully designed shortbread cookies have a series of Girl Scout messages on top and a rich fudge coating on the bottom (Approximate count: 16).
• Trefoils – light and delicious
  Tasty, tender shortbread cookies that melt in your mouth (Approximate count: 44).
• Tagalongs – wildly popular
  Tasty cookies topped with creamy peanut butter and covered with a luscious chocolate coating (Approximate count: 15).
• NEW! Café Cookies – a gourmet-style cookie
  Carmelized with brown sugar, this charmingly crisp cookie will delight all cookie connoisseurs. With a hint of cinnamon spice, it's perfect with your favorite hot beverage (Approximate count: 47).
• NEW! Sugar-free Little Brownies
  Made with real chocolate chips! An explosion of chocolate flavor in a bite-sized package! You won't believe this luscious treat is sugar-free. (Approximate count: 20)

Thanks for your support and help! And don't forget, you can pay via PayPal!

Watch Out For That...Spatula?

Things are little crazy these days at Casa de Chili. Seems if Momma gets a sinus infection and possible strep throat and then adds a migraine or two, things come to a screeching halt. I'm fine, don't worry about me. Definitely getting better. I just don't have the wit to write an original post. So today I give you my foray into gourmet cooking: Rice Crispy Treats a la Spatula (originally posted January 17, 2006).

The Background: About 10 years ago (before kids), we lived in a cottage with a steep driveway. We lived across the street from the cutest little family ever (they had a 2yo). We had two cars; of those, my husband's was a Mitsubishi Mighty Max truck. The name was clearly wishful thinking because it was nothing more than a wind-up car. I was out of town visiting my mom.

The Story:
My husband was preparing to go somewhere (probably to play golf) and forgot something in the house. He went back in and when he came out his truck was rolling down the driveway, across the street, across the cute family's lawn, and into their chimney. Yes you read that right. INTO THEIR CHIMNEY--he forgot to set the truck's emergency break on that big hill of a driveway. That was bad enough, but the family was actually out in their driveway watching the truck roll toward their house and wondering why my husband was trying to run them over. When my husband came running out the house his first thought was for the cute family's cute little daughter. Thankfully, she was fine and no where near the truck. As it turns out the truck did not do any damage to their home. Woo hoo! You would think this is where the story ends. If I weren't such a busy body it probably would have ended there, but read on.

As my husband is relaying this story to me I am mortified. How on earth were we going to make this up to them? Well, duh! I'll make them rice crispy snacks! Nothing says I'm sorry I hit your house and almost ran over your family like a batch of rice crispy snacks. Right? So you see my logic. Anyway, at that time I was not known for my prowess in the kitchen. Seriously, though, how hard could rice crispy treats be? So I gather my ingredients, my pot, and my spatula. I'm stirring and I'm stirring. Then I take out my spatuala. Hmmmm. Something looks different...My spatula is now a stick without the flat spatula part. Huh? Where'd it go? I dig a little though the mix and can't find it. Maybe it melted? Ah well. It's still good. Yes, again, you read that right: IT'S STILL GOOD. I proceeded to spread the mix into the pan and take it over to the neighbor's house. Yes. I. Did. I also saved a little sumpin' sumpin' for myself.

I presented my masterpiece to the neighbors and they gave me tour of their house. I apologized profusely and hoped they would take the rice crispy treats as a token of my embarrassment. When I returned to the house I dove into my little stash. Two bites in I can't chew the treats. I take that piece out of my mouth and...it's the spatula.

In answer to your obvious question: Yes. I'm available to cater your next event.

Ask Chili: Wk 4

Dear Chili,

What on earth should we do with those people who refuse to check their e-mail?  Who say things like, “Oh, here’s my address, but just call me because I check it, like, once a month.”

Signed,
Needing more 21^st-century friends

Dear Soul Sister,

You can always respond with the ever-popular, "Excellent! Here's my phone number. You can call me, but I only answer my phone on odd Fridays between 2 and 3." There are other options:

• Offer them string and tin cans with your e-mail address on them.
• Smile and nod. Then only e-mail them. If they really like you, they’ll check the e-mail. Or they’ll keep missing play dates. Make sure the play dates are scheduled somewhere fun for you so it won’t matter whether they show up.
• Ditch them.

I don’t hang with anyone who doesn’t check their e-mails a quadrillion times a day. I should be able to carry on a conversation via e-mail because they check their e-mail so much. Sure, we could IM, but that’s not the point now is it?

*********

Ooooh la la la la Chili!

Please riddle me this...  why do you choose to hide your face and your kiddies' from the internet?  (I figure this might give some people good insight for their own actions!!)

THANK YOU!

SARAH COOL :)

Dear Sarah:

Are you wearing a can-can skirt right now? Or just a tight green catsuit? Oh no. Please tell me you aren’t wearing the catsuit with the can-can skirt. That’s just wrong. Now if you add a little mask to that you might have something.

Speaking of masks, I choose to wear my mask because it's just terribly comfortable. I think everyone will be wearing them in the future.

PS: And really, God help those who look to me for insight for their own actions.

Well, Which Is It?

The saddest thing I've read in a while:

I recently spoke with a junior who was stressed about her decreasing ability to focus on anything for longer than two minutes or so. I tried to inspire her by talking about the importance of reading as a way to train the brain. I told her that a good reader develops the same powers of concentration that an athlete or a Buddhist would employ in sport or meditation. "A lot out there is conspiring to distract you," I said.

She rolled her eyes. "That's your opinion about books. It doesn't make it true." To her, the idea that reading might benefit the mind was, well, lame.

Still, I'm not ready to throw in the towel just yet. I'm turning the new-arrivals shelf into a main attraction in my school's library. Recently I stood Charles Dickens's "Bleak House" next to the DVD version produced by the BBC. Lady Dedlock (Gillian Anderson) graced both covers. A senior fingered the DVD for a minute, then turned it over to read the blurb. "The book is too long," she said. "Is the movie any better?"

"You're right. The book is long," I said. "But once you start this one, you won't be able to put it down, right from that first page about the London fog."

"I think I'll watch the DVD," the student said.

Then I read this:

According to some cultural observers, "book" is becoming a substitute for "cool" thanks to the pervasive influence of text messaging.

As some of you are no doubt aware, when the "T9" predictive text function is activated your cell phone will try to guess the word you're typing as you key it in on those frustrating number keypads. As it turns out, when you try to type in "cool" - that is, 2-6-6-5 - phones will, by default, suggest "book," and, according to some, the kids are running with it, and "book" has become another word for "cool." So, all you teachers out there, your work is officially done. Books are now cool, literally.

Books aren't cool. Yes, they're book! What? No, wait. They're not book, they're books.

Oh, forget it. I guess I'm too old to understand why anyone would ever not want to read a book--whether it was book or not.

Happy Birthday, Max!

Max is nine years old today. NINE. What happened to nine months?

Indulge me.

Max is so funny. When he was two he played a joke on me by stealing my towel while I was in the shower. When I emerged, sopping wet, and yelled (playfully), "Who stole my towel?" I could hear him giggling and running down the hallway.

Max is so smart. This kid amazes me with his ability to figure things out and his desire to learn. He loves math and science. He's beginning to love writing and reading.

Max is a builder. He can build amazing structures out of anything: Legos, pipeworks, blocks, pillows, marshmallows. You name it, he can build it. The castles and communities he builds with his Imaginext blow me away.

Max's imagination is huge. His heart is even bigger. He is shy, but outgoing. His giggle makes me smile every time. Max is a world-class snuggler. I take advantage of that at every opportunity because I know it won't last forever. He's my best boy.

Happy birthday, Max. I'm so glad you're ours. I love you!

WFMW: Using the 'Find' Feature

Sometimes it doesn't occur to me to share certain tips with you because I think everyone must know them. Then I use them in front of someone (like Shannon) and she says, "You really need to post that because I had no idea you could do that and I bet other people don't either." So here you go. My tip I thought I everyone must already know.

When you are browsing any page in any browser (as far as I know--I've tried in IE and Firefox) and you're looking for a particular word or phrase, you do not have to use the Edit pull-down menu at the top of the screen. Instead, follow this short-cut:

1. Hit Control and F at the same time. A little toolbar will pop up at the bottom of your screen with a box for you type in your search term.
2. Type your search term. The associated word will be highlighted on the screen and you'll find what you're looking for much faster. If what you're looking for is not on that page you'll get a little *splat* noise.

Try it and see what happens. You'll get the drift soon enough, and then you'll be hooked. No more going to the Edit pull-down menu like a sucker for you! You're all about the short-cuts! You techno-guru! Yeah!

Now head on over to Shannon's to check out the other Works-For-Me Wednesday tips!

Different is Good, Right?

Shannon and her kids came over last week to help break up the monotony of being iced in with no school. A few times the kids came to us for help and Shannon had her ever-ready answer: Be a problem solver.

In fact, at one point she looked at me and said, "I know that after I die and my kids are sitting around remembering me, the one thing they will say is, 'Be a problem solver!'"

This is where I had to laugh. Because that's difference between us: she's positive and helpful, I'm annoyed and don't want to be interrupted.

When I die? My kids will be citing things like, "What's your damage?" and "Whatever."

And yes, I have a therapy account. Like I didn't know that was coming.

Ask Chili: Wk 3

Dear Chili--

• Beans or no beans?
• 1 alarm or 4?
• Is it true what my dad used to say about the weather: Chilly today, hot tamale?

Sincerely,
Hungry

Dear Hungry,

• Definitely beans. Unless you're Mr. Chili, then no beans. I'll let you ponder that one.
• Two-alarm should suffice unless you are complete wacko and a true chilihead (I am not. I only call myself that to blend in and sound cool).
• Have you seen the weather? My tamales are covered in ice.

**********

Dear Chili,
Where do numbers go when we aren't using them?

Namaste,
Philosophical

Dear Phil,

You don't mind if I call you Phil, do you? Phil, lay off the LSD. This little film will show you the hazards of too many mind-altering drugs. Take heed and don't be the marijuana spider.

Wow! Thanks, You Guys!

I'm just amazed and humbled (and that's saying something!) that so many of you have left birthday wishes for me (and/or linked here from your own blogs). Thank you so much. It was such a surprise to wake up and find so many comments! Then, for the rest of the day, I was treated even more well-wishes! I've never had so many comments in a single day! This really brought a smile to my face.

Really, y'all. Thanks. It was  great birthday and you had a lot to do with it.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Today's my birthday and I'm 36. I'm not even worried about telling you that. Yes, I'm hitting the dark side of 30, but that's OK with me because in my head I'm still about 28. Since I'm about eight years off, by the time I actually feel 36, I'll actually be 44 and that will be OK too because  I'll still think, "Hey! I'm only in my mid-thirties!" I'll be so focused on that that I'll forget to be bummed because I'm actually in my forties. I may be a little bummed when I realize 36 is the dark side of the thirties, but it'll still be better than worrying about being 40 so I'll be happy. (Apologies to all you old farts out there. And I write that with all the love of a 28 year old.)

And that gal singing? I totally dance like her. That is probably the most embarrassing thing I can tell you on my birthday. So you see? When you can't do math and you dance like an 80s girl, 36 ain't so bad.